just tryna live my life & be the best I can be


A girl with with a mind full of dreams, thoughts and loves.

Part 1: A Taste of the Hustle

3 jobs and the second last month of my senior year in high school.

For one month, that was my life and I've learned a lot through this time that I put upon myself. Since this experience has been really tough to talk about because of how dense it all was and how much it ended up effecting me in the future, I've decided to split this story into 2 parts. This week, Part 1 will be featuring how and why I got myself into this difficult situation and next week, I'll talk about what I learned from it all. 

Why did you get 3 jobs?

Well, in my defense, two of them are seasonal. I applied for a job at a local shop close to my house that I've been wanting to work at for a while, but I didn't want to quit my regular part-time job just in case I didn't get hired. As for the other seasonal job, the workplace mostly runs in the summer time and it started in May. I knew that it was a pretty easy one since I had worked there last summer which involved minimal work and I needed money, so I just went for it. Around the time the new season started, after a group interview for the local shop job, I found out that I had gotten it which made me more than happy. As soon as I could, I gave a two weeks notice letter to my part-time employer which meant I couldn't officially leave until mid-month. 

If you thought I did all of this without thinking it all through, that is false. I did have to think this through a lot before I made any decision to quit my regular part-time job. I would've had to take a risk in relying on hope that I'd get the job that I applied for, but I choose not to take that risk. In the end, I never regretted this decision I made (even to this day), because I've managed to pass through all the obstacles that came with having three jobs!

Were there any other obstacles you were going through besides handling school and work?

HELL YES. Believe it or not, I had to deal with bed bugs. Yes, only a few of my friends know about this battle I've been facing because I found it embarrassing (but now, I don't care and I am trying to save your life). Bed bugs are real and I'll never not understand and not appreciate the saying "Don't let the bed bugs bite!" whenever someone would wish you goodnight. I haven't gotten many bites until springtime, but when I finally told my mom about the mysterious bites that kept waking me up and disturbing my sleep at night, we found out that bed bugs were feeding on my blood.

I've actually been getting bitten since October, while I thought it was just random summer insects still hanging around. However, when bites persisted in the winter, I became really confused as to what was attacking my skin. If you've never had bed bugs, let me tell you this - they're an absolute nightmare. I can't even count how many times I've been woken up by them biting me between 3 and 4 in the morning, having to find out where they bit me, having to move downstairs on the couch to continue sleeping, and once I was officially done and angry at the blood suckers, eventually running after them trying to hide from the light and killing them right after they'd bite me.

I've done tons of research on how to get rid of them, where they come from, what kind of smell they don't like, and reading other people's relatable traumatic experiences (I've even had a nightmare I was getting bitten by a TON of them..). It's amazing what these little evil bugs can do to effect your mind. I was so paranoid to sleep in my bed for a few months that I'd have insomnia, but eventually, I became accustomed to sleeping downstairs on my living room couch. Anyways, I could talk about bed bed bugs forever, but I just wanted to give a summary of how tiny insects played a big role in making my life difficult a few months ago. 

Lastly, how did you balance it all? 

Firstly, I do not recommend anyone putting themselves in this position. I had no idea what I was getting myself into. All I knew was that I would have a hard time balancing work and school, which I didn't succeed in, actually, I completely failed and I fell behind in school, but that's pretty self-explanatory. I ended up having to eat my lunch in class during my second period in order to have lunchtime to work on projects which didn't help much. There wasn't much I could do. On the weekends, I'd work double shifts, which by the way, are hell (though I'll explain that more in Part 2). After I'd come home around 9 pm, I'd be too tired to do anything whatsoever because despite only working around nine hours that day, my jobs are different from each other - they all involve interacting with people, but one involves standing in the sun for hours, one involves being totally present, and the last one involves a lot of physical labour. 

With bed bugs and schoolwork, I also had a few shifts on school days that would go on until late and on Thursdays, I had multiple music lessons that would expand to 4 hours every other week. Also, if you read my post on my 1 year anniversary, I wrote that I created part of that post on the bus to anywhere and now, you know why - it's because I was HUSTLIN' with all this ish in my life. 

To conclude Part 1 of A Taste of the Hustle, while I was going through the hell that was the month of May I will never get back, I don't think I was ever really happy. In fact, it felt like each and every single day of that month, a significant part of my happiness was diminishing.. I became blatantly distant from my friends, my patience with myself and others became shorter, and I just didn't feel whole anymore. Fast forward to the present moment, I'm still struggling with regaining joyful and good vibes within me. I'm learning that it's much harder to gain rather than lose.

Anyways, I'm still recovering from this rough time. My mental health has never suffered this bad by something that I put on myself. Even though I'm no longer in the situation I was in a few months ago, I'm still working and feeling like I'm condemned to keep on doing what I have to do instead of what I want to do. Despite these negative end notes, I have learned a ton on this experience and you'll have to stay tuned for next week's post to see what kind of knowledge I've extracted from this month of hard hustling!